Head vs Heart..

I have always had this thought in my mind. Don't you think all of us constantly fight a battle. A battle between the heart and the head. Who should one listen to? Who wins? Very difficult to answer that question. Ask a lover for instance, a failed lover. Someone who has been dumped. Or someone who has been rejected. I should not make fun of them. But I don't know why, I have this urge in me, I want to write about them. They are one of a kind. More importantly, the failed lovers help me understand many life issues we face on a daily basis. I am trying to find out a clear answer. If at all there is one. 

So here goes.  

Excerpts from the diary of a failed lover. (Followed by my analysis). 

"Something strange happened that day in class. Something that I hate myself for not noticing at the very moment it happened. I have this very weird feeling of missing out on knowing something that I should be knowing. I want to find out. I will find out. It matters to me. She matters to me. A lot." 

Right, so the guy thinks (head) that he failed to notice something about her crush in class. He feels (heart) that he should be knowing it. There probably is nothing that happened at all. But his heart wants his head to figure out what happened. And so he does. Heart scores. Head 0 Heart 1.

"She looks so beautiful in that dress. She wore it only to show me today during rehearsals of her play. Should I ask her out? I know she likes me too. I can sense it. Tomorrow is the big day. Good luck to me." 

New found love. Heart will always win. Head has no place. Head 0 Heart 2.

"Today is the happiest day of my life. I have found my soul-mate. The love of my life. She is the one for me. I wish to spend the rest of my life with her." 

It seems the girl accepted the proposal. But hang-on. Did he just say soul-mate? Wow, the heart is having a ball here. Feelings have taken over. There is no level-headed-ness. Head 0 Heart 3.

"I am too young to get married. Why doesn't she understand? I better not get carried away with my feelings here. I guess we need to talk. We both need some time out of this. We need our own space. Things are going too fast."

Finally, the guy shows some maturity. He listens to his head. Probably they got into it in a haste. They may be the perfect couple. But they are not sure of the future. Typical. Head 1 Heart 3.

"No, I have no regrets for last night. It is natural for any guy to give in to temptation. As long as I didn't invite or made my way through it myself, I don't repent. I had a nice time. That matters. Besides, no one will come to know. Definitely not her."  

Men will be men! Head 2 Heart 3.

"I like this independence. I really think it was needed. I feel more at ease now than I was while I was dating her. I got a feeling she wanted to break-up as well. I am pretty sure. The fact that I do not have any doubts regarding my feelings for her, means I was always better off without her. Yay, I am a free man. Thank God, she didn't get to know about the other night."

No feelings. No emotions. No heart! Head 3 Heart 3. 

"I can't imagine I have put myself in this position. It is killing me. I hate myself. She was meant to be mine. I miss her. Would she be feeling the same for me? I know she is seeing the guy from the other class. They seem happy together. May be I should talk to her. May be not. I guess, I should let her be. I do not want to ruin her happy relationship. I guess I will act happy for her. I am dying from inside, but I won't let her know. I need a drink. Sigh."

There you go. This is so typical a story of a failed lover. He still has feelings for her. Or does he? My sense is that his heart keeps reminding him of her but the fact is that he is already over her. The feelings are nothing but a sense of him missing someone in his life. Not necessarily her ex-love. His heart is trying to seek a comforting zone in order to fill the vacuum created. And the comforting zone is nothing but the past. The head wins here, hands down. The heart is compromising. Head 4 Heart 3. 

I could go on and on. This head vs heart debate will never end. What I wanted to point out is that feelings can never overtake soundness. The degree of soundness and the intensity of feelings will always remain subjective though. There can never be a clear winner I guess. It is the circumstances and the nature of the person that commands an answer. 

One thing is for sure though, there are many life lessons that the story of a failed love can give us. Go ahead and explore a few of them from the above instance. Am sure you will find perspectives (if not answers) to many of life's day to day battles that we fight. If I have confused you with the above findings, well, may be I have. I started off with an intent of finding an answer. But the fact is that there is no answer. And I am glad I figured that out. Infact, I guess I have raised lot more questions instead.

Happy pondering! 

PS. The above scenarios are purely a work of fiction. Any resemblance with any real-life events is purely coincidental. Further, any attempt made at relating the above excerpts with my real-life happenings will be dealt with severely.  Severity can be discussed offline though.